Will an Aquarius Man Come Back after a Difficult Breakup?

Loren E. Elara

Loren E. Elara

Hi, I'm the resident astrologer on the site. If you have any questions or insights of your own let me know in the comments!

Do Aquarius guys ever come back after a breakup?

The short answer is: yes. Aquarian men will come back to a relationship when it suits them to.

Their hot and cold persona can have them changing their minds on a whim. (They’re also entirely capable of dropping a connection completely).

But, will your Aquarian guy come back to you?

That’s a bit more complicated. Let’s take a look and see what we can do to help you figure your situation out.

In this post I’ll cover:

  • Why your breakup happened (and why that matters)
  • Assessing whether it’s worth trying to get back with him
  • Some powerful tips to get him to come back to you (if you decide that’s what you want)

If your relationship is meant to be, you’ll find what you need here to get things back on track.

Alight, let’s get to it.

What went wrong to cause your breakup?

So things have fallen apart between you and your Aquarius man. That sucks.

No breakup is the same. And the circumstances are important when assessing whether he’ll come back to you or not.

  • Did he ghost you randomly?
  • Did you get into an argument and he shut down?
  • Were you wanting more commitment but he wasn’t ready?
  • Did he (or you) cheat or otherwise practice infidelity?

If it was a bad breakup, he’s probably gone. This can happen if you didn’t establish a potent connection with him.

Aquarian men are notorious for breaking things off and moving on with their life like nothing happened. They can be ice cold like that.

But his nature is also variable and he can switch back to hot suddenly. If you really are special to him he might eventually wander back like nothing happened. (So long as you don’t chase him away further… More on that later).

If he does come back, will it be worth it? Are you even compatible?

I’ve got some great tips coming up for you in the next section. But before we rush into them, take a moment to consider if getting this Aqua guy back is the right choice for you, or if you’d be better off moving on.

Here’s a potentially harsh truth: if you weren’t really close or special to him, he’s likely gone for good. And that might be for the best. If you weren’t compatible, you weren’t compatible.

Secondly, if you aren’t highly compatible but he still comes back, you might not have a great time. You could end up dealing with a lot of hot and cold energy, and more disappearing acts.

I know you miss him. I know you’re probably thinking about him a lot and trying to figure out how to get back with him. But take the time to consider if he’s really the right guy for you.

Take into consideration what’s important for you. Put yourself first. For example, maybe he wasn’t ready to commit, but you wanted to, and it drove him away. If you want to find a partner who’s ready to commit to you, then that’s what you want. Don’t settle for less. If he’s not that guy, he’s not that guy.

Consider the possibility that you don’t need to get back with this guy. And that the breakup was actually an opportunity for you to grow and move on. If he was the type to put you down or keep you small, then you absolutely should find greener pastures.

At the same time, maybe he’s your soul mate. And this is just a rocky step in an otherwise fairytale partnership.

If that’s the case, read on and follow these five steps to help nudge him to come back to you:

How to get your Aquarius man back

The Aquarius man does what he wants. He’s all about freedom and will go wherever his heart desires. Sometimes the whims of his heart tell him to disappear from the people in his life. And disappear he will. He’s the king of ghosting.

Call it what you will. Unsentimental, perhaps. But it’s the way he is.

It’s all good and fun when you’re hitting things off and spending time together. But not so much when he leaves you.

Getting him back is tricky. You can’t directly manipulate him. Freedom is an essential condition for his relationships. You have to lure him back in a way that makes him want to lean into you again, without pressuring him.

1. Give him the space he needs

The most likely scenario is that, whatever happened, he detached himself and shut himself off from you. Aquarius men cope with deeper emotional hurts by distancing themselves.

If he’s going to come back, it’ll be on his terms. You have to give him the space he needs.

You have to be willing to let him go to get him back.

Forcefully trying to get a disenchanted Aquarian man back with you is a recipe for failure. You instead have to be cool about the breakup. This relaxes him. Because the more you try to hold on, the more he’ll distance.

The absolute worst thing you could do is to argue with him or otherwise create drama. All of this feels like you’re pressuring him. Which he hates. He needs room to lean into you again. If you don’t give him that room, he will just push you farther away.

You can’t talk your way back into his arms. You have to let go. To get him space. And then show him that you should be together again through your actions.

2. Show him that you’re okay without him

Aquarius men are hyper-individualistic and require partners who are independent as well.

One of the common reasons Aquarius men dip out of a relationship is that they want to feel free again. He might still like you but started to feel trapped by your relationship dynamic.

This may or may not be the scenario of your relationship, but regardless, showing him that you’re not desperate to get back with him will win you major points in his eyes.

Showing that you aren’t too shaken by being without him will raise your value in his eyes. It conveys that you’re self-sufficient. That you can handle being alone.

When he sees that you’re okay with being alone, that’s when he’ll feel like it’s safe to come back to you.

So don’t rush to talk to him about what went wrong and how to fix things. Especially when the breakup is fresh. 

Do your best to be unruffled by the breakup. Carry on with other aspects of your life. Do your best to genuinely collect and soothe yourself. You can’t really fake this. He’s got a strong truth radar and will likely know if you’re genuinely alright or faking to convince him.

The most effective way to get the message across to him is by not contacting him.

No calls, no texts, no talking, no contact.

3. Make him see what he’s missing

People break up because there’s something missing in the relationship.

If he broke up with you, there could be a few causes:

  1. He created flaws in the relationship
  2. You created flaws in the relationship
  3. Or, there was a combination of flaws instroduced by each of you

If the answer is number one, then good riddance to him. But more than likely, the answer will be the third option. And to get him back you’ll want to reassess and reinvent yourself a little bit.

No, this doesn’t mean you need to reactively change who you are so he’ll want to be with you again. Your response should be the opposite of losing yourself, it should be finding yourself.

Take this opportunity to assess where you are in life and how true you’ve been to yourself.

What did he love most about you when you were happy together? Did you change at all since those peak days? Did you get complacent? Focus on reestablishing those qualities and he’ll be reminded why he fell for you.

Take inventory of any other flaws in the relationship. If you couldn’t get passed certain disagreements, would it be worth it to you to change your stance? If your breakup reflected similar issues that you’ve had in other relationships, what is the lesson for you?

Be open, honest and ready to change things up if you want him to start things up with you again. He loves adventure, so maybe it’s time to go on a trip or excursion that you’ve always wanted to experience. Whatever it takes to feel more fulfilled and confident.

Remember, you should take a break from reaching out to him. But you can get him to see any changes you’re making by haunting his periphery a little bit via mutual social channels.

4. Increase your value by being desired by others

Most people lose touch with friends during and soon after a breakup, so there’s probably a big hole in your social life.

Aquarian men are highly social creatures. He’s probably going to reassert any friendships he’s neglected, and it would send a strong positive signal to him if you did the same.

Better still, start dating again.

I know, you want your Aqua man and he’s likely irreplaceable. But it’ll be healthy for you to feel wanted again, and it makes you more desirable and creates a little scarcity in his mind.

Your rebound-dating life doesn’t have to be serious. Just have some fun (if that’s something you’d enjoy, that is).

If you do date around after your breakup, make sure you’re not doing it just to make him jealous. Aquarian men are perceptive, and he’ll likely catch onto this and be repelled.


If you do start talking to your Aquarian guy again, don’t bring up commitment. Just focus on making your conversation light, enjoyable and flirtatious again.

Don’t talk about the future, just be in the moment and have fun.

Being confident in the moment makes you come across as confident about your own future, which will make him want to be a part of it again.

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