Do Scorpio guys test women while dating and in relationships? Absolutely!
Scorpio placements are incredibly cautious, and men with Scorpio as their sun sign will want to investigate a potential lover thoroughly before committing to them. He might put her through a ton of tests during this process.
It can be frustrating to be faced with his tests. But remember, everyone tests romantic partners, whether they know it or not. It’s just part of the process of human relationships.
Luckily for you, this post will help you pass any tests a Scorpio man throws your way.
Why does a Scorpio man test you?
Scorpio guys test because it helps them understand many valuable details about you. For example, he can discover how you stand up to stress, the depth of your self-esteem, and how willing you are to follow his lead in the relationship.
His ultimate goals can vary, depending on what he’s looking for from you.
For example, a Scorpio man might test your ability to stand up for yourself with fantastic boundaries or if you have weak boundaries and would let you get away with a ton (a situation which he could potentially exploit for selfish reasons).
Related: Why are Scorpios So Hated?
10 Ways a Scorpio man might test you
1. Self-esteem tests
Scorpio men employ various tests to assess a woman’s self-image and confidence levels. They might test your independence levels by playing hot and cold, canceling plans, taking abrupt trips, or leaving your messages on read for extended periods. He might assume you have low self-esteem if you get upset or clingy.
He also might ask you point-blank early in dating about everything you like to do for fun. If you struggle to share much, he’ll likely see you as not very proactive in life due to suffering from low esteem and thus are more likely to be clingy.
Scorpio men are also known to push boundaries hard to test self-esteem and boundaries. He could do this by subtly degrading you with offhand comments or actions to see how you react.
2. Jealousy tests
This is another self-esteem test that Scorpio men often employ. He might test if you’re the jealous type by interacting with women while you’re around or online to see if you have a strong reaction. He might also discuss other women with you, bring up past partners, or comment on attractive female celebrities to see if you’ll react jealously.
3. Submissiveness tests
Scorpio men are often hyper-assertive and controlling. It can be important for these men to feel like the leader and provider in a romantic relationship. He might want to avoid entering a relationship where a woman doesn’t listen to him, constantly tests him, or refuses to let him handle certain situations.
They’ll often test a woman’s submissiveness by her willingness to follow his lead. He might test you by setting plans in which he guides the trajectory of the experience. He’ll look closely to see how willing you are to let go of control and follow his lead. He might also create situations that test whether you’re willing to defer to him when he has more expertise. If you’re combative and unwilling to defer to him, he could be less likely to pursue you for anything long-term.
Related: Why are Scorpios So Hot?
4. Attraction/interest level tests
As mentioned, Scorpio men may go hot and cold to test your self-esteem, but they also are notorious for doing this to test your interest. By abruptly taking a step back and not initiating conversation, he’s testing to see if you’ll reach out more yourself as a display of interest.
He might also test your interest through listening/retention tests. He might tell you something offhand with the intention of circling back to that topic to see if you remembered what he’d said. This doubles as a test to see if you have good memory recall, as well as checking your investment in him if you remember what he’s said.
5. Loyalty tests
Scorpio men are guarded emotionally and, as a result, are big on trust and loyalty. These men usually test a woman’s loyalty early and often in a relationship. He might quiz you about past relationships or get the information indirectly from mutual friends or acquaintances. Some Scorpio men can be straight-up paranoid about fidelity and may even snoop through your phone or dig up information about you on the web.
There’s also a chance that your Scorpio guy may put you in situations with his friends where he’s encouraged them to be flirtatious to see if you reciprocate their intimate flirtatious energy.
Related: Are Scorpios Loyal?
6. Material/financial tests
Many Scorpio men fear being taken advantage of financially by an opportunistic woman. To combat this fear, he’ll test you to see how you behave around money and resources. He could do this by hiding his financial situation early on and waiting to see how you bring up the topic of finances. He might also leave his wallet behind on a date to see your reaction when put in the position of being asked to pay.
7. Intelligence tests
Although Scorpio is an emotional water sign, these men are also highly cerebral and intelligent. They want to be with a woman who’s also driven by intellectual stimulation and possesses excellent common sense. In the early stages of dating, a Scorpio man might test you by bringing up topics such as philosophy, politics, or current events. He’ll look at your engagement level to assess your interest in mental pursuits and will look closely to see if you have well-formed opinions.
8. Integrity tests
Women usually employ this test more than men, but Scorpio guys will often test a woman’s integrity hard, too. Reliability and truthfulness are critical to Scorpio guys, as a woman’s willingness to follow through on what she commits to says a lot about her integrity. If you change her mind on something she committed to doing or not doing, he will lose respect for you and trust you less.
9. Availability tests
A Scorpio might spring sudden plans on a woman to test whether she’s willing to drop whatever she’s doing to be with him. On the one hand, he could do this to test whether you’re into him, but he could also be doing it to test how much of a life you have outside of him. If you’re always willing to spend time with him on a whim, he might interpret this as you not having much going on in your personal life.
10. Sexual willingness tests
Scorpio men will test a woman’s willingness to progress towards sex for various reasons. One reason is that he fears being in a relationship with a woman who’s unable or unwilling to satisfy him sexually. Usually, they’ll ask you a lot of questions if this is what they’re testing for.
Other times, Scorpio men just want a partner for quick sex and will push sexual boundaries early in the courtship to see how quickly you’re willing to have sex with him. If you relent to having quick sex, it can lower your long-term viability in his eyes. He might even judge you for it after because resistance to having sex early in a relationship is typically more evolutionary appealing in a woman from a man’s standpoint.
This does depend on the Scorpio man, though, as many Scorpio men are simply highly sexual and want a long-term partner who is, too.
What you should do if a Scorpio man is testing you a lot
Ultimately, a Scorpio man’s tests can be fruitful for both of you. By testing you, he wants to determine how he’d fit into your life and how you’d fit into his. He also likely wants to assess if he can trust you and if they’ll feel secure in dating you.
For this reason, it’s best to be encouraged when a Scorpio guy is testing you, as it shows he’s clearly interested in you.
But you need to be smart and aware of the situation because there’s a chance that he’s actually testing how vulnerable you are to emotional manipulation or abuse.
It’s a sad reality that many Scorpio men (and men, in general) are thirsty to exploit a woman for resources or selfish sexual reasons. These men will test you for weaknesses to see if they can exploit you. Scorpio men, in particular, are adept at assessing a woman’s weaknesses and lack of boundaries.
Remember, a little bit of testing is healthy, but too much testing and boundary-pushing is often a sign of controlling behavior. Watch out if he’s playing hot and cold to the point of seeming bipolar. Also, watch out if he’s trying to manipulate your emotions in other dramatic ways, such as blatantly trying to stir up your jealousy or by love-bombing you.
Related: What are Scorpio’s Worst Traits?
No matter what, remember to stay true to yourself in the face of a Scorpio man’s test. Never lose yourself trying to get his approval. And don’t change yourself to fit his tests unless you really think that’s how you want to be. This protects you from potentially abusive behaviors.
In the end, authenticity is the most important thing in a relationship, and sometimes testing shows that people aren’t authentically suitable matches. Let that process unfold, and if you don’t align with a man, don’t try to manipulate yourself (or let him manipulate you) into something you’re not.